Over the past few weeks, several new tango dancers have told me that they are awful dancers. NO!! You are beginning tango dancers! This is even more a habit when dancers who already know a different dance, decide to start tango.
Treat yourself nicely
If your child tried to do something new, would you inform them that they were bad at that thing? No! You would remind them that they are new to that activity, and that they will improve as they have more experience. Then why do we castigate ourselves in a way we would never treat someone else?
Gentle goals
You are a tango baby for at least a year. Martha Graham said it takes ten years to become a dancer. Think about it: many of your cells are replaced within seven to ten years. After you have danced that long, your body consists of cells that don’t even “remember” when you didn’t dance! Pretty cool, eh? What if you gave yourself a long-term goal as well?
North Americans like life in the fast lane. We expect drive-through food and coffee, almost instantaneous gratification from Amazon deliveries, on-demand hot water and clean water. In such a world, I hesitate to say what I was told as a beginning tango dancer: you won’t be good for at least three years. I was shocked. Now, after 29 years, I am still getting better at this dance, and I have embraced the long view. Why was I in a hurry anyway?
Learning/relearning things is not easy
I try to tackle new activities on a regular basis. As a teacher, it helps me understand the learning process better. For myself, it reminds me how beginners feel on the dance floor.
I am learning to do a pullup. Yes: ONE pullup. I have not managed to do this yet. At first, I could not even find the muscle pathway in my body. I felt a blank spot between hanging from the bar and about half-way up the pullup. However, with the help of my fitness-crazed teenager (who can easily pick me up), I am getting a lot of help getting up to the pullup bar. He is coaching me how to do the movement and pushing me to do my best. I hope to do one pullup by the end of the year.
I am also relearning guitar after about thirty years of ignoring mine in the corner. It’s rough. I used to be much better than I am now. I used to learn faster. I made songs that I didn’t write down or record because I was sure I would never stop playing guitar; now they are lost forever. Still, I am proud that I am almost playing the new song that drove me to restart my guitar playing: Jose Garofalo played “Te Vas Milonga” during a class, and I immediately went home and bought the sheet music!